I want to see more time in my days.
I think I have a lot of emotions and I think I need a way to express them.
This journal will be for those sensitive moments.
Hidden away where no one knows to look, or creep.
Today I was talking to AO,
and I got memories of SE suddenly.
Frustration.
Was I even in a relationship?
I feel as if it were all give an no receive.
A year and a half of long distance relations...
A year and a half of isolation in a town where I knew no one.
Waiting to talk to her, only to have her give me a couple of minutes before bed
I wasn't important enough.
I remember waiting, always.
Everything that was mine was hers.
But nothing that was hers was ever mine.
Always waiting.
I felt like i was being under appreciated several times.
Taken for granted.
Maybe I've glorified her because she was beautiful
I don't remember any good anymore, and I've finally allowed myself to.
I remember one sided sex.
I remember being cheated on.
I remember being lied to and it changing my entire life.
I remember that voice that I can't stand.
That fake soft, high pitched voice she used sometimes.
I don't remember any good.
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